Impatiens: A Lesson In Parenting

So remember how about a month ago I bought all those annuals and I needed to plant them? Well, Sam really wanted to help but since I had a lot to do in a fairly short amount of time, I was not as patient as I could have been, nor near as willing to accept Sam's help. I felt bad about that so I decided to buy some flowers which Sam could plant all by himself. I would give him a space to dig the holes (however close together he wanted to) and then let him do the planting, however he wanted to. A time for Sam to have full control.  I know, I'm such a good mom :) (Please read that sentence sarcastically because I've been telling myself if I was such a good mom I would have just let Sam help me in the first place and maybe ended up with one pot which might not have lived up to my standards of perfection. Oooh sadness. (read more sarcasm there too.)) So I got my friend Janice to pick up some impatiens for me because I feel like impatiens remind me of how impatient I am and they would be a visual reminder to be more patient with Sam. Then I waited for a day when 1) it wasn't too hot, 2) it wasn't too wet and 3) we had a bunch of time to get dirty. And yesterday was the day.

Before (left) and after (right)

I thought under our hedge, near the fence, would be a good place so I went ahead of Sam and weeded and he started digging. Unfortunately Rachel was quite distracting, wanting to steal our tools and dig in the flower beds and play with the pruning shears, so I opened the sandbox and convinced her it was the coolest place on earth to be for awhile.

And then the parenting lesson hit because after digging one and a half holes and planting one plant, Sam announced he was done. "I'd like to play in the sandbox Mommy" and off he went. Part of me struggled -- this was OUR time to plant together. I had arranged this just for Sam. It was supposed to be FUN! There were seven more holes to dig and plants to plant. It was supposed to be his time of planting how he wanted and my time of letting him have that. And then I stopped -- if Sam wanted to spend his time playing in the sandbox he was happy. He was having his time of doing what he wanted to do and I didn't need to be forcing him to follow the original plan of having fun.

Parenting, especially for an organized planner like me, is all about letting go of the reins and realizing that it's okay when my kids follow a different plan. Especially when the original plan was supposed to be about having fun. It's no fun forcing people to have fun according to the plan if they are not on board with the plan.

So now my impatiens will remind me that once again, no matter how much I want to be, I am Not. In. Control. And Sam did decide to get involved again when it came to watering them. And he still calls them "his plants" so I guess that counts for something, right?!?!

 

Hours of sleep last night: 7.0

Snack free nights: 3

Times at the gym this week: 2